The FT.com blowout hall of fame

Featuring the flop top fop himself and special guest stars.

Postby Project on Sun Feb 17, 2002 1:15 pm

Since a number of our members have recently been experimenting with their tyre manufacturer's claims of long lasting and superior build quality, I thought it might be handy to have a quick run-down of the most spectacular results from these "road tests" to date:-

In third place - Phil Si

Having spent the best part of six months practising his handbrake turns in his Si, Phil then decided to see how fast he could make his car go. As he hit 88mph (on the local racetrack, ossifer), his flux capacitor came to life and promptly ate one of his rear tyres.

Blowout score - 5 out of 10

Second place goes to - Mark Stewart

Having lowered his Zetec 2i so far that even the little men were unable to get under his car, Mark was unaware of the presence of one trapped little man who was signalling for help by lighting small fires in his wheelarch. Unfortunately, one day the fire got out of hand and set fire to the inside wall of his prized rubber cornerstone.

The resulting blowout sent mark bouncing off the road, through a field of corn, and coming to rest up a cow's arse.

Six month's later his car still shoots popcorn out of the airvents after a long run, and the constant smell of hamburgers has rendered Mark, a former member of the BeefEater's association, a vegan (and a vegetable to boot).

Blowout score - 8 out of 10

And First Place goes to - Charlie Brüder

Normally, spare tyres are designed to be changed as soon as possible. Approximately 18 months after forgetting his front o/s tyre was a spare, it decided to remind Charlie of it's old age at 60 on a country lane.

Charlie, however, did not lose control of the van for another 3 weeks as he had become so used to the vague and unpredictable handling of the van that it felt no different to normal.

Having lost control of the van, it seems Charlie then proceeded to confuse driving technique with pinball technique by aiming straight off the road, and directly towards the nearest solid object. The resultant smash conveniently destroyed only the Diesel engine, dodgy front bumper, and rusty bonnet, leaving the rest of the van, including the bonnet scoop, surprisingly intact.

High score - 34,200
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Postby Robin on Sun Feb 17, 2002 1:27 pm

:lol: very funny
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Postby AndyBlackFRST on Sun Feb 17, 2002 1:41 pm

some people seem to have too much spare time...

MORE MORE MORE!!!
Car is back...
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Postby Excursion on Sun Feb 17, 2002 1:43 pm

llama! The combine harvester jokes have only just stopped :lol:
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Postby Dan_200sx on Sun Feb 17, 2002 1:46 pm

llama!!

Al you bored or something mate, very funny1
Ever thought about giving up the day job! :lol:

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Postby chumkila on Sun Feb 17, 2002 6:05 pm

:grin:
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Postby elm_us on Sun Feb 17, 2002 6:10 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

class m8 class keep them coming
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Postby Bridger on Sun Feb 17, 2002 6:54 pm

:lol: :lol: Wicked mate :lol: :lol:
Cheers Bridger :D
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Postby Project on Sun Feb 17, 2002 7:47 pm

On 2002-02-17 12:46, ZetecTurbo3I wrote:
llama!!

Al you bored or something mate, very funny1
Ever thought about giving up the day job! :lol:

Dan


If only mate! :smile:
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Postby FlashXR2i on Mon Feb 18, 2002 7:50 am

hahahahaaa Al...
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Postby The Bruster on Mon Feb 18, 2002 5:43 pm

Yay!!! I won something!!!! MyVan'll still get magasine featured too!!!! -in teh smash section of maxpower!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Postby The Bruster on Mon Feb 18, 2002 5:45 pm

And whats with the umlout ont the U you git :razz:
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Postby Tom SX on Mon Feb 18, 2002 5:46 pm

not entirely accurate Al,

the diesel engine still runs :eek: :lol:
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Postby TJ on Mon Feb 18, 2002 6:18 pm

Al you are one crazy guy mate.
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Postby custom boy on Tue Feb 19, 2002 7:09 am

bloody funny man keep the updates updated!!!!!!!
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Postby Project on Fri Mar 29, 2002 2:35 pm

bttt for Chaz's Maxxy P feature :grin:
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Postby The Bruster on Fri Mar 29, 2002 2:38 pm

See mate you words did get published in a modin mag :wink:
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Postby Project on Fri Mar 29, 2002 2:56 pm

Woohoo! :grin:

Did you say that when you wrote in, or is it just sheer coincidence? :smile:
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Postby The Bruster on Fri Mar 29, 2002 2:58 pm

you got mail :wink:
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Postby fiesta_fras on Fri Mar 29, 2002 4:15 pm

LOL :lol: :lol:

has anyone with the damned cossie wheels had a blow out yet??
RIP Robert Martin - Rob - Elm_us
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Postby SYRSMAD on Fri Mar 29, 2002 5:43 pm

What you trying to say :razz:

Never had a blowout never intended too!!

Beware at Southend tomos night!!

EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :wink:

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Postby SimonT on Wed Oct 30, 2002 7:57 pm

:lol:
Too old and too bald.
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Postby Brad on Mon Feb 10, 2003 1:46 am

I wanna be considered!

A blow out caused the following : http://www.arcdelta.com/1/crash.htm

I hit a wall, a tree, a fence, a hedge and two concrete poles. Also, this was the garden of the old peoples home. The car then rolled 3 times down the road, coming to land on its back.
Purple Mk3 1730cc XR2
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Postby Summer22 on Sun Mar 23, 2003 11:05 am

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :bonkers:
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Postby ~Vix~ on Sun Mar 23, 2003 2:25 pm

:lol: i remember the pic of Charlie standing on his van! :lol:
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