Phil Candy injured in 'goating' accident!

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Postby AdrianFRST on Wed Feb 13, 2002 3:02 pm

this just in:

PHIL CANDY INJURED IN 'GOATING' ACCIDENT

Floppy haired teen icon Phil Candy was today injured in a bizzare goating accident. Candy, who is belived to lie consistently about his age, and therfore has not been verified at the time of going to print, had been participating in the 'sport' for a number of months prior to today. The accident happend when Candy made an attempt to 'mount' his steed, the identity of which has not been revealed. Paramedics were alerted to deal with Candy's 'conquering device' which had become lodged after it's acceptance into the rear of his steed during the entry process.

Candy's lawyer, Andrew Macrobie of E-Legal Activities, said that his client had not been arrested as a result of the incident, but was merely accepting a lift from a passing Police car and "enjoyed wearing handcuffs for fun sometimes". Despite a string of similar incidents leading to Candy's arrest on several previous occasions, he remains a free man.
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Postby JamieFRST on Wed Feb 13, 2002 3:12 pm

:grin:
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Postby andymac on Wed Feb 13, 2002 3:25 pm

As Mr Candys legal representative in this matter I would like to point out that there is no substantiating evidence of any kind and that Mr Candys previous arrests have not resulted in a single conviction and thus have no relation to this new matter.

The allegations against my client are completely unfounded. Mr Candy has repeatedly protested his innocence and states that he "slipped and fell in while sexually aroused" and the concept of mounting these steeds for "sport" appalls him.

Furthermore, much of the photographic "evidence" regarding this matter was received from an anonymous e-mail address by staff at a certain fleet street newspaper.

Analysis of the photographs has shown that they have been expertly doctored to show Mr Candy preparing to engage in what can only be described as "dubious" activities.

Said analysis has also shown a late model Ford Fiesta Zetec S in the background - the police are currently searching for the owner and believe the driver may be able to offer a fresh perspective on the case.
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Postby The Bruster on Wed Feb 13, 2002 3:33 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Postby Phil Si on Wed Feb 13, 2002 6:24 pm

class :wink: i love it
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Postby elm_us on Wed Feb 13, 2002 6:44 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

ade : 2
phil : 1

:lol:
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Postby dr_blackman on Wed Feb 13, 2002 7:14 pm

Ace :lol:
7 Years and on my 5th Car, Fiesta 1.1i, Saxo VTR 98bhp, Bmw 318is Coupe,C2 VTS and now a 1998 Toyota Supra ;)
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Postby Tom SX on Wed Feb 13, 2002 7:15 pm

llama andymac
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Postby Excursion on Wed Feb 13, 2002 8:23 pm

bums
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Postby housey on Wed Feb 13, 2002 9:12 pm

:rolleyes:
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Postby Phil Si on Wed Feb 13, 2002 9:17 pm

:wink: :grin:
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Postby Gaz7 on Wed Feb 13, 2002 11:52 pm

i heard something about MarkFRST being involved in this as well - incriminated as an 'accessory' or something!!! :wink: :wink:

Gareth :smile:
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Postby Dan_200sx on Thu Feb 14, 2002 12:03 am

I think thats Gaz: 1
Mark: 0

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Postby andymac on Thu Feb 14, 2002 11:26 am

-- IMPORTANT --

Police last night released surveillence footage of the alleged "ringleader" of the gang who induldge in theis goat mounting "sport".

The identity of the beast concerned has been hidden to protect it from further mental scarring.

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If you think you recognise this individual we urge you to ring your nearest police station in order that they can be brought to justice and the suffering of these poor animals can cease.

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: andymac on 2002-02-14 10:38 ]</font>
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Postby JamieFRST on Thu Feb 14, 2002 12:06 pm

:eek: llama :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Postby FlashXR2i on Thu Feb 14, 2002 12:09 pm

:lol: :lol:
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Postby Fezzy Turbo on Thu Feb 14, 2002 12:58 pm

Phew!!!...at least it doesn't say sheep......so i'm ok :wink: :grin:

Phil...i knew there was something dodgy about you :wink:
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Postby elm_us on Thu Feb 14, 2002 11:10 pm

andy u bugger im gonna get the blame for that now u SOB :bonkers:
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Postby andymac on Fri Feb 15, 2002 11:29 pm

BTTT

Its all elms fault, he made me do it !!!
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Postby elm_us on Fri Feb 15, 2002 11:42 pm

that so aint fair andy you B1tch its took me 3 months to be taken of ades msn BLOCK now im back on it again me thinks :cry:
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Postby andymac on Fri Feb 15, 2002 11:58 pm

Oh dont be such a wuss !!

I doubt very much ade has either of us on block.... :oooh:
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Postby AdrianFRST on Fri Mar 29, 2002 1:19 am

*crash*

Uh.. ooh what's this? *picks topic up and examines it*

Now where did it come from? Arrr... not sure, I'll just put it back on the top for now. :wink: :grin:
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Postby The Bruster on Fri Mar 29, 2002 1:24 am

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

This pornagraphic sculpture wos found in Elmus's bedroom earlier this week, police as looking inyo it :eek: :eek: :eek:

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Postby elm_us on Fri Mar 29, 2002 2:12 am

glad i put that mask on now

um woops :lol:
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Postby Choosey on Fri Mar 29, 2002 12:31 pm

:aaah:
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Postby AdrianFRST on Tue Oct 22, 2002 8:46 pm

Oh no! I've only gone and brought this back to the top again!

How careless! :lol: :D
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Postby andymac on Tue Oct 22, 2002 8:50 pm

Whoopsy indeed :lol: :lol: :lol: :D
Nothing to see here...
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Postby vanny magnet on Tue Oct 22, 2002 8:51 pm

AdrianFRST wrote:Oh no! I've only gone and brought this back to the top again!

How careless! :lol: :D


And there was me thinkin it was Groundhog Day :rolleyes:

:lol: :lol:
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Postby XR2i Chick on Tue Oct 22, 2002 8:53 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Forgotton all about this one!!
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Postby Kev on Tue Oct 22, 2002 9:59 pm

***NEWSFLASH*** ***NEWSFLASH***

This news just in. After an internal investigation into the footage released by the police force, it has been found that the evidence had been "doctored", in order to in some way disguise the identity of the escaping "3rd person"

Please, it is vitally important we find this person, as they may have critical evidence as to who the ringleader is. So please do not hesitate to call your local police station with ANY information to help us find this ghastly gang member.

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:D :D :D

Don't know WHY i'm getting involved???????
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Postby elm_us on Tue Oct 22, 2002 10:45 pm

that fooking pic is gonna haunt me forever :lol: :lol:
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Postby TJ on Tue Mar 25, 2003 11:25 am

Are we sure it was a goat???

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